Buttkickin’ Halloween Songs: “The Castle Hall” — Ayreon (1998)

Cries from the grave resound in my ears They hail from beyond my darkest fears Faces of the past are etched in my brain The women I raped, the men I’ve slain Shades of the dead are sliding on the wall Demons dance in the castle hall… Aw man… the song couldn’t be more Halloween…

Buttkickin’ Halloween Songs: “Helter Skelter” — The Beatles (1968)

I’ve got blisters on my fingers!! Oh, hai guys. Been a while. Any changes in the year since we last met here? Besides The Looming Face of the Apocalypse Staring Us Dead Center In The Eyes Like Some Horrifically Soul-Suckingly Terrifying… Looming Face, I Guess? And here we are at the beginning of October, with…

Buttkickin’ Halloween Songs: “The Zoo” — The Scorpions (1979)

It’s not over. It can’t be over. No way. But alas kids, here we are, smack dab on All Hallows Eve, the culmination of the entire month of October. Hell, for some (your intrepid narrator included), the culmination of many months of anticipation and celebration. And as such, we celebrate Halloween and another fine season…

Buttkickin’ Halloween Songs: “Everything Happens To Me” — Spike Jones (1959)

When I was first constructed back in 1929 They had a hundred scientists, all working overtime They even had a Graveyard Shift on my assembly line Everything happens to me They mixed me up with strangers and they didn’t care what kind They stuck a bolt right through my neck and fastened it behind But…

Buttkickin’ Halloween Songs: “Scarecrow” — Beck (2005)

I’m walking through the other side With the devil trying to take my mind And my soul’s just a silhouette From the ashes of a cigarette Illusions never fake their lies Trick cards fool the eye Carry zeros over ’til they add up Bury tears in the chapters you shut… Look, just because it’s Halloween…

Buttkickin’ Halloween Songs: “The Green Manalishi (With The Two-Pronged Crown)” — Judas Priest (1979)

Now when the day goes to sleep and the full moon looks And the night is so black that the darkness cooks And you come creeping around Making me do things I don’t want to do… Hokeyfolks! Guess what? We are now three nights away from Halloween, which of course means we’re in the home…

Buttkickin’ Halloween Songs: “Isle of the Dead” — Sergei Rachmaninoff (1908)

CULTURE! There’s a couple of options I can exercise when introducing a classical piece. On one hand, I can do a basic recap of the song which acts as little more than a watered-down Wikipedia entry. Or I can talk about the song itself and what it means to me and why I feel it’s…

Buttkickin’ Halloween Songs: “Am I Evil?” — Metallica (1984)

My mother was a witch, she was burned alive. Thankless little bitch, for the tears I cried. Take her down now, don’t want to see her face Blistered and burnt, can’t hide my disgrace… So I when I started my Freshman year of college, we’re talking the late summer and fall of 1988 (*shudder*), I…