{"id":15722,"date":"2026-10-12T19:41:51","date_gmt":"2026-10-12T23:41:51","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/millheiser.com\/hokeyblog\/?p=15722"},"modified":"2026-10-12T19:41:53","modified_gmt":"2026-10-12T23:41:53","slug":"buttkickin-halloween-songs-the-blob-the-five-blobs-1958","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/millheiser.com\/hokeyblog\/2026\/10\/12\/buttkickin-halloween-songs-the-blob-the-five-blobs-1958\/","title":{"rendered":"Buttkickin’ Halloween Songs: “The Blob” — The Five Blobs (1958)"},"content":{"rendered":"
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*Pop*
Beware of the Blob
It creeps and leaps
And glides and slides
Across the floor
Right through the door
And all around the wall<\/em>…<\/p>\n\n\n\n

And only Steve McQueen<\/em> can save us…<\/p>\n\n\n\n

We have returned with the latest installment of Buttkickin’ Halloween Songs<\/em>, and this evening you and I are taking a ginormously gelatinous leap back to 1958. Ah yes, the late 50s, when movie monsters were radioactive and teenagers all looked like they were pushing thirty. I mean wasn’t Stockard Channing like 34 when they were filming Grease<\/em>? Listen I love both her and the movie. Ne’er-do-well Rizzo may have been, but a teenager? Perhaps not…<\/p>\n\n\n\n

(Yes I know that was Frenchie’s song. I sing it at karaoke religiously. Just go with me here…)<\/p>\n\n\n\n

But alongside the radioactive ghoulies and mid-life-crisis zippy teens, the late 50s also reminded us that the <\/em>greatest threat to humanity was a gigantic glob of strawberry Jell-O with a voracious appetite for human flesh. That’s why our selection today is The Blob<\/strong>, performed by The Five Blobs.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

That’s right; this is the gloriously goofy theme song from the 1958 sci-fi horror classic of the same name, starring the aforementioned Mr. McQueen. I mean, a younger Steve McQueen. Years before Bullitt<\/em>, The Great Escape<\/em>, and becoming the coolest goddamn human being on the planet.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

But what makes things really <\/em>interesting is that The Blob <\/strong>was written by BURT FREAKING BACHARACH! How many other<\/em> Halloween playlists have Burt Bacharach tunes? Ehh? Ahh? I’ll wait.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Yet it’s true. The man responsible for “Walk On By,” “I Say a Little Prayer,” and countless other pop masterpieces (alongside co-writer Mack David) also composed a bouncy little number about a murderous mound of pudding. And I love every goshdarn second of it. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Ostensibly the song isn’t all that much. It only has one verse, repeated three times. And The Five Blobs weren’t actually five guys. They were just one dude, a cat named Bernie Knee, whose voice was overdubbed to simulate an entire group. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

The song itself is an infectious little slice of late-50s novelty rock, complete with goofy harmonies, a bouncing saxophone, and absolutely nothing remotely frightening about it. Which, considering the movie features an ever-expanding mass of alien goo literally devouring people whole, makes the whole affair that much more hilarious to me.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

I mean honestly: this is the soundtrack of a late 50s\/early 60s Tiki Lounge in mid-October. Lots of guys with pipes and shimmying women in cocktail dresses and repressed sexuality and rigid conformity and more than one lampshade on someone’s head.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

But there you have it. Two minutes of delightfully ridiculous monster-movie madness, courtesy of one of the greatest pop composers who ever lived. So what if The Blob<\/strong> isn’t exactly a nerve-shredding exercise in ever-growing terror? Sometimes, and perhaps often, Halloween calls for a catchy song about a carnivorous glob of space slime. With a bouncy, sax-driven grab-bag of lounge lizardry.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Wait, is “Lounge Lizardry” an apt descriptor? It is now<\/em>. Nobody rush out to patent anything, I’m still trying to lure a possum out of my house…<\/p>\n\n\n\n

A splotch, a blotch
Be careful of the Blob
*Pop*<\/em>.<\/em>..<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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